Just Don’t Look Down

Are you afraid of heights? If you are one of the 5% of Americans who suffer with acrophobia, then you can easily identify with a strong sense of fear that a person struggling with social anxiety deals with on a daily basis. Imagine yourself 110 stories at the top of the Willis Tower in Chicago; the one with the glass bottom floor. Your chest and throat tighten, your hands sweat, your teeth clinch while sheer panic takes over your entire body. Logically you know that thousands of people have visited this same floor and no one has ever fallen through it to their death. However, you are totally unable to trust your sense of balance. This is how an introverted person such as myself can feel in our ultra-social society. It is extremely overwhelming. Sometimes I think, “I would be OK if I could just cover my face and become invisible.” The irony is I love people. I just do not do well in crowds of them for very long. Small talk is like a foreign language to me. It is difficult to chime in or find a segua into a conversation that is purposefully light and meant to stay on the surface. There is nothing wrong with chit chat. It is friendly and polite. I know this to be true, but I am unable to make a connection with anyone if the topic lacks depth or real purpose. That sounds super harsh I know! I am just trying to explain the chasm that exists between a typical extroverted conversationalist and one who relates to the world through introspection and observation. I have never shared my struggles with social anxiety or anything of depth with anyone other than my closest friends and family members until now. It takes immense courage to come out of an emotional “hidey-hole” yet there is something screaming inside of me; a voice longing to explain to the whole world why introverts recoil from it. Clearly this is an extremely unhealthy response to life. Therefore, I will abandon the proverbial place of safety to finally become free.

So, with my hands away from my face and my eyes wide open, I will jump up and down on this glass bottom floor. I invite both extroverts and introverts to join me in a journey to overcome the fears we may or may not share. My desire is to offer insight and support to those of you out there who struggle with anxiety and fear; whatever it might be and from whatever perspective. The angles each of us see life from may be quite different, but the end point we all desire to reach is the same. We all want to have security, love, friendship, balance, peace, and true meaning. We must each make a conscious choice to be brave or hide away and suffer the consequences of an unfulfilled life.

The final conviction to be brave and do the necessary work in order to battle this lifelong issue came recently when my son randomly asked: “Did you know that Batman was initially afraid of bats?” I answered: “Yes, and that is exactly why he became one! …(light bulb – ON!)

To overcome – whatever it is, we must really look at our surroundings and notice they do not outline the true source of our fear. Together lets look in the mirror and see the irrational reflection of the lies we have been telling ourselves or listening to.

Just don’t look down,

Crystal Bosse

Control: by JJ Heller